Posted in Blog

The Comedy of Life

Hey SnoFlakes! So yet again, it has been a year since I have written. This seems to be the norm with me. I promise I am going to try and do better. Grab yourself a glass of tea and lets get to it. Although I warn you, get some tissue. CRY Post alert!

I hear people say all the time, “Life is a funny thing”. It truly is. I feel as if life is a game, and if you play it right, you can win! But what if it isn’t in our control? What if you just have to play with the cards dealt? What if no matter how much you plan, make wise decisions, be kind to others, even show unconditional love, no matter all those things, life can throw a punch in the gut that can take the wind out of you. Let me explain.

If you follow my blogs, you know that the last two years, I have had one turmoil after the other. 2018 was going great, everything had aligned with the stars, life was good. Then, BLAM! November, my mother became ill. Long story short, I ended up missing every holiday through Valentines day, at the hospital. I brought her to Alabama, and she loved it there, for awhile anyway. After she got back to her stubborn, and healthy self, (now I know where I get it from), she wanted to go home. Home to the town where I and my brothers were all born and raised. She had never left in 46 years. Mom didn’t care for the big city of Birmingham, so I took her home.

Jump ahead to 2020. Life is back to normal, I am working my real estate, Life is good. I am telling you all this to get to a point, I promise. Just keep reading!

Our Last picture together Dec 2019

On January 12, three days before his 54th birthday, Freddie says he didn’t feel well. Now this man, he is NEVER sick. Mind you has minor blood pressure issues, but it is under control. Or so we thought. So he proceeds to go lie down, being he has to work tonight. Freddie works in the coal mines 15 hour days, 7 days a week. He’s done that for at least 6 years. Oh, every now and then he will take a two or three week vacation. So, my film family and I are downstairs, filming a short movie. They were there all the time, always a house full of film crew, just hanging around, swimming in the pool, or like today, “let’s make a Movie!” as Bill would say.

Afterwards, everyone has cleaned up, and gone home, except a couple of close friends. “Has freddie went to work?” I asked. No one has seen him. I get a funny feeling, I go upstairs, and there he is laying face down, across the bed, in the same position as earlier. He hasn’t moved. Button and Jasper is laying by his head. I touch his leg to wake him up, and he is cold. COLD COLD. Now let me tell you, all the emotions going through your body at a time like this. Even now, a year and half later, I am tearing up. Immediately, I lost all senses, began screaming for help at the top of my lungs. Chad runs up, we call 911, but its too late. By the time they arrive, he is gone.

In a split second, my whole world, my best friend, my husband has left me behind. What do I do with that? How do I breathe? Our kids! How will I tell them? He will not see his grandsons grow up to be just like him.

Our Family Christmas 2012

The next two weeks, hell, the next year is all a blur. I don’t remember the funeral, who was there, who sat where, or even what was said by Pastor. The funeral was filmed, (why I did that I have no idea), but I watched it over and over for months on dvd. I blamed myself. If only. If only I had checked on him. Did he go in his sleep? Or did he call my name? Did he suffer? So many questions. I never got to say goodbye. I guess the funeral was a way to keep him here, if for at least a little while. It finalized it. Then, one day my bestfriend found me watching it, and took it from me. Thank you. I was keeping myself in a state of depression. I had to move on she said. At my own pace, but I have to.

Remember at the beginning when I said what if you can’t control the cards dealt? Perfect example. What do I do now? Do I just stay in bed, and never decide to go out in the world, and enjoy what is left with the rest of my life? No, I think not. When a person gets dealt something of this magnitude, you turn to God. At least for me, that is what brought me out. I got up, I went to church, and cried all the way home. All I saw was Freddie standing at the door. I went to a friends birthday party, they were playing music, couples everywhere. I saw Freddie. He was a blues man at heart. A dj of blues, known for his skills. Point is, everywhere I look, I see him. And even though I was sad, it was also comforting to know, he will always be with me. There is a permanent imprint on my heart that will never go away.

Positive Quotes about life, Your life and Quote life – inspirational quotes

I am doing well now. That’s another story, but I have made it through the hardest part. Learning to love my own company. Learning to move on, and carry Freddie with me.

So I told you all this, not to make you cry. But to Encourage you. Your situation may be worse, or not as bad. But when life punches you, it’s ok. Take a deep breath, stop, think, pray, and move forward. It looks bad now, but we can’t see what God sees.

So get up, put on your big girl (or boy) pants, and let’s enjoy this crazy, wonderful, short life we are given! If I can do it, so can you. I am here if anyone ever needs to talk. YOU GOT THIS!

Dedicated to Freddie lee Wilson 1/16/1966 – 1/12/2020

If you or someone you know is dealing with depression, or would like emotional support, the Lifeline network is available 24/7 across the United States.

No copyright infringement is intended in the use of Photographs.

Posted in Blog

What is really Important to You?

Written December 2019 – posted October 2020

Hello SnoFlakes! Have you ever been in a place in life where all of a sudden everything fits? It seems your on the right road, life seems perfect. But then all of a sudden, something comes along that throws a rock in your path. A quick detour wouldn’t hurt, right? Then, all of a sudden, you look up and your off track. You ask yourself, “how did I get here?”. That is my life right now.

I was on track, my life planned out, going along great. A great husband, a huge family, great career. Since we talked last, I have passed the Real Estate Board in Alabama! You are looking at a Real Estate Agent of Keller Williams Realty Metro South, Alabaster Alabama. With hard work, and long hours, I finally got my Business up and going strong. Not fantastic, but promising. I also am still pursuing my career in the Film Industry. It has really picked up. There is a steady flow of work happening in Alabama, that keeps me busy in between Real Estate clients. After hard work,I have made a name for myself, to climb the ladder, and be trusted with important decisions on set. Life, as it may, was perfect!

Then, one day out of nowhere, like a mac truck hitting a bump in the road, I get a phone call. November 14, 2019. My mother, of 71 years old, has taken ill. Not only is she in the hospital, but she is being flown to a better hospital two hours away from her home, for emergency surgery. My mother lives six hours north of me, in a little country town in Southern Illinois. A town of 14,000 people, one grocery store, literally two police officers, and everyone know each other.

So, now after speaking with the doctors, I have packed a few bags, and am on the road, leaving my family behind, two days before Thanksgiving. Long story short, mother stayed in the hospital two weeks, and then was released to rehab. Where, she refused to stay, and after only five days, checked herself out. Now, if anyone knows my mother, you know she is hard headed. Once her mind is made up, that’s it! There is no changing it. So I stay with her at her home for three weeks, and once she is stable, I head back home to Alabama. Great! Mom is good, now I can get back to my life, and get back to work. Nope. Too good to be true. Four days later, Mom was found in bed unresponsive. The ambulance came, they flew her back to the big Hospital, and I hit the highway.

So, here I sit, two days before Christmas, in the dark, writing to you. Oh, mom will be fine. After a whole lot of convincing and a little bit of fear of being alone, she is coming to Alabama to live with me. I sit here and think how I miss my family, my husband, my fur babies. How I long to sleep in a bed, and not on this rubber couch. As I listen to the lull of the IV machine, and the sound her breathing, I realize how tired I am. For almost two months, we have been in and out of hospitals, with doctors and nurses coming in and out of the room every hour it seems. Oh how I long for a full nights sleep. But with all that, I wouldn’t be anywhere else. I am where I need to be at this moment.

As I sit here, I think of Christmas carols, and baking cookies, and tree hunting. I think of my husband on the roof of the house trying to hang Christmas lights. And ask if a sudden, none of that seems important. I realize at this moment, the only thing important is family, and those we love. Saying, “I love you”. Making sure every moment counts. That is what is important. Not things.

So the next time you feel the urge to fuss, or complain about something, stop and think first. Is this really a deal breaker? Is this that important that I need to waste words or time to give it any energy? I think not.

Until next time, have a great day Sno Flakes! I’ll have your tea waiting.

Posted in Blog

Listening to Silence of Darkness

There is always something about the waves of the Ocean that has a calm, a peace about them. I love hearing the crash, the sound as they break on the sand. But have you ever went at night, and just sat under a full moon? Don’t say anything, just listen.

Hello Sno Flakes! Come on in, grab a cup of tea and let’s chat! I realize it has been a long time since I have written. There has been a lot of changes in my life, and I know you want to hear about them. But first I want to talk about peace.

As I sat here tonight, in the dark on a blanket, on Pompano beach just outside my Hotel the Residence Inn, I felt a peace come over me. No one there but me, and family, I thought back over the last 6 months of my year 2020, with everything that happened.

My husband of 17 years, passed away January 12th. Right after the New Year. My whole world changed. I was now alone, and didn’t know if I could get through this. Of course, I had his children, our friends. But you must understand, when your in love with someone that long, you become best friends. You do everything together. Everything. Then one day in a split second, they are gone.

Then came along covid, so now I had to be alone in my home, just me and Button, to grieve and quarantine. (Thank God for good friends.) I eventually had to sell the house we bought together. I couldn’t ride his motorcycle, so I sold it to his best friend. We bought that Harley together, and rode it all over the country for over 15 years. That was difficult. Then his truck, little by little his things were getting sold off.

My fur baby Button

Now I am at a point, where God is telling me to relocate near my family. My mother needs me, but even more I need them. But, I felt sad of leaving the only home I’ve known for a long time. Is this the right move? Second guessing myself.

So as I sit here in the dark, listening to the waves in the moonlight, I can hear my brother and his son a little down the beach, making a sand castle. Two grown men enjoying the simplest piece of life. I had to smile. I reflected on my life, and the changes I have just endured. I realized at that moment, just how strong I am.

I realized I can do this. With God, anything is possible. I never heard God more clear than I did tonight. “Go. Move to Kentucky, and be near family. Be still. I have plans for you, only I can see.”

If there is anyone in your life, that is remotely your heart, let them know it! Don’t waste one second in negativity, in arguing over things that doesn’t matter. Tell each other, SHOW each other at every chance, just how much they would be missed if they left you. I never got the chance to say goodbye. But I know Freddie is with me every day.

Take the time to listen. Listen when someone is speaking to you. Most importantly, listen when God is speaking. Yes, we pray for guidance, for things, for others, but we must also listen. Be quiet for a moment and listen to the darkness.

Until next time. I’ll have your tea waiting.

Photos taken by me, Snow @ Pompano Beach, Florida.
Staying at the Residence Inn by Marriott, Pompano Beach.

Posted in About Me, Blog, Family, Travel

Get-a-way not far away

12718060_10153298109626086_6591059843356293445_n

#greatsouthernroadtrip

Hey there! Come on in! Let me get you some Tea. When is the last time you’ve been on Vacation? I need one, maybe two back to back. I really need to get away. But there isn’t any time for that! It is an everyday struggle to get a moment to myself, let alone a couple of days. I have way too much going on to leave the City.

Speaking of which, have you ever researched your City to see what is hiding within the concrete? There are always places to run away and hide for a couple of days. If you are anything like me and my family, it is crazy around home, all the time. There is hardly ever any peace and quiet, and when there is, it’s very minimal. My husband and I, as you know from previous posts, have been together almost fourteen years. We have a huge family. People are always coming and going at the family home.

Every now and again, just to get away, Hubby will call on friday from work, and tell me to pack us a weekend bag. I get all excited! I know we going on a get-a-way, not far away. You know, the Hotel across town, or over in the next town and hour away. We disappear all the time. It gives us time to be alone, and be on vacation, while still close to home in case of an emergency. I love our getaways! The alone time in the rooftop pool, the room service at two am, the nightclub downstairs. Just a couple of days, one night even, can be so rejuvenating. dsc_0740

I especially love the one day trips, to explore the city. I hear people say all the time, “There is nothing to do in Birmingham!” That is so not true. Birmingham has so much to do. There is such a thing as Google, and the internet. That search thing, it works wonders! We have a Zoo, Museums, dozens of Parks. The nightlife is awesome too. I love my city.

I especially love this place outside the city, Turkey Creek. I found this place from an elderly Lady at the gas station. I told her I needed a place to go swimming. She ultimately told me of Turkey Creek. She told me of how she enjoyed it as a child. Intrigued, I researched it. Located in Pinson, Alabama, only 15 miles north of Birmingham, Turkey Creek Nature Preserve is a great place for couples, or families, to get away and go for a picnic on the grass, swimming in the creek, or tube down the natural falls. Go bike riding,  hiking, fishing and so much more. We have been going here for years. We never knew it existed before that conversation. After a day here, I always feel like I’ve been away on vacation when I get back home. Even though it is technically near the city, it feels as if you are so far away.

4188440ddac8fa29

I want to challenge you. Take a few moments, and research your city. Open your mind to the millions of possibilities that your city has to offer. Find places that interest you, and take a day away from it all. Just disappear. And it doesn’t always take money. Most of our Museums are free. Make precious moments with those you love, your children, your spouse. Plan a date with hubby, let him pick you up at the door, and go on a real date! How awesome that sounds.

Take the time to enjoy life. Often times, we can go through life day to day, in and out of time, just like robots. There is no excitement, no joy. Make a point to enjoy your loved ones while they are here. If you can’t do a whole day, start small. Surprise hubby for a picnic on the grass at his job. It’s amazing what one hour of conversation and alone time can do. Tomorrow is not promised to any of us! Enjoy life, enjoy your city. Enjoy each other. A relationship can only withstand the time put into it. It takes effort and attention. Speaking of attention, my glass is empty again. Must refill! Until the next glass of Tea, stay blessed, stay Southern.

Enjoy-Life-To-The-Fullest-Inspirational-Life-Quotes

COPYRIGHT © 2016 SnoSouthernLife

Posted in About Me, Blog, Family, Self Help

I love my life, do you?

Hey ya’ll! I know, I know! Why has it taken me so long to write? Well, hunny, let me tell you! Sit on down, let me get you a glass of Tea! Where should I begin? Life. I am in love with my life. The ups, the downs, my husband, my friends and family. I am so full of Joy!

Life can be so funny, so demanding. One day passes you by, then two, then the next thing you know, a whole week has gone by. Life is what we make of it. I believe that with all my heart. If we constantly focus on what we want, or what could be, instead of what is, what we have, we will be forever stressing, worrying, striving for that happiness, that truthfully may never come. But to have Joy? There is a difference. Happiness is an emotion, from an event in our lives, whether good or bad. Joy is an inner peace, that no matter the circumstance, it never waivers.

Quote-63

I thank God everyday for my husband. I am not bragging on him, but yes I am! God has truly blessed me. A couple of days ago, we got a letter from his job, and July 1st will be his last day of work, yet again. They are going out of business. He has been laid off three times in the last six years. Twice within the last 6 months. Just frustrating!

224Let me tell you about hubby. My husband is a man of integrity, honesty, hard-working, and dedicated to whatever he puts his mind to, including his family. He loves to work, and never calls in, ever. He has had an award for the last 10 years for perfect attendance, at all of his jobs. Babe worked at the McWane Cast Iron and Steel plant 25 years, up until 2010. They went out of business due to the Economy. Now while unemployed for almost 9 months, he never gave up. I worked, and he was the best hubby ever. My husband did what all women dream of. He cooked, kept the house spotless, and even did laundry! Imagine that. The entire nine months of unemployment, it did not affect his happiness at all. He never gave up hope. We lost our home, got behind in bills, credit went down the drain. Not one time did he complain. He kept paying his tithes out of his little unemployment check, (which was not near what we were bringing in). He never became angry or upset at our situation, always full of joy.

He did eventually get work, underground to the Coal Mines. He did not complain, never called in, and was considered a very productive employee. As a matter of fact, life became so good, he told me to quit work, due to my health, and focus on getting well. “Just take care of you and the house. I got the rest!” I told you he was a good husband didn’t I? Even though my husband made good money, really good, he never let it go to his head. We did not buy the fancy cars, a big home. We prepared ourselves for that day when…..

13263702_1144089868988235_6729298350021052043_n

Now, six years later, the mines went out of business. Some Obama thing about cleaner coal, or something. That’s another story. Any ways, another 4 months without work. This time, we are both unemployed. But he never wavered. He found another job, at a significant pay cut mind you. He worked three months, and then we get this letter. Really!? Ugghh!

Life can be so mean at times. There are ups and downs. Life can take you through some things, that would cause a normal person to have a stroke or become ill, if they let it. My husband and I, we live a life of simplicity. At the same time, making sure we are productive. We do like the nice things, but what we don’t want are “things”.  Our home is small, but it is comfortable. It is a nice home, just for us. Our cars, are paid for, no notes. Those things are material. They are just not at the top of our list right now. I, we, would rather live a life of Joy. A life with stability in knowing, what ever we go through, he will be there. We, will go through it together, no matter what!

My husband is a giving person. Never meets a stranger. He will give the shirt off his back if you are cold. Always blessing others. Sometimes, he actually gets on my nerves with it. Hubby is a man of God, who knows, the more we bless others, God will in return bless us. I am happy with what we have, where we are, and where life is taking us. I am happy with the life we have built together as a family. If more comes my way, I am waiting with open arms. Until then, I am full of Joy!

Life-is-what-you-make-it

So I just want to encourage you today. I want to slip a little Tea into your life. If life get’s you down, just hold on. Don’t waste one minute! Keep pushing, and never look back to what could be. Life may take you places where it seems you can never recover from. Do not let go of that dream, that hope. A better day will come. Some storms are worse than others. Whether big or small, eventually, the sun has to come out. The sun always shines brighter, after the storm. The clouds clear, and the sky is crystal blue again. Now let’s fill that glass! Until next time, stay blessed, stay Southern!

Posted in About Me, About Me, Blog, Family, Self Help

Family isn’t always Family

Hammock-Swing

Why hey ya’ll! How’s it goin? I am blessed and cool under this shade tree with my Tea! I just love those cool days when I can sit under the tree, relaxing, with not a care in the world. Just me, the shade, and my tea. Not for long though. I can always count on my two little ones, my dogs of course, to interrupt me. They come running, jump up on the hammock, all excited, and then just plop right there and go off to a nap. Why do I have to move to make you comfortable? They are the epitome of family.

188643_5408811085_4787_nYou know?! The one who always gives out a great big hug just when you need it. Or the cousin who makes you laugh at nothing funny at all. Some of us have that Aunt that always wants her way or no way. Or that Uncle that is always drunk at the family holiday, asking for money from the kids. I have a brother like that, well used to. Now he’s going to be upset me writing this, but it’s ok. I love my family with all my heart. But sometimes you have to just get away. Or move away in my case! I just left, moved to Alabama, because I could not take the selfishness and in-consideration for others any longer.

Please allow me to be specific. At the time, 14 years ago, my brother was an Alcoholic. I say was, because he is no longer, and has been sober for quite some time. It took him years to get himself together, to get support of those willing to endure his attitudes, his countless disappearing acts, his anger. But he did it, and I am so proud of him.

That brings me to the title of this blog. Family isn’t always family. If it was not for my brother’s best friend, and in-laws, (ie; sister and brother in-law), I am not sure where he would be. I had been through enough with my abusive ex-husband for the last ten years. I did not want to endure another ten. I was trying to get myself together. My life was a mess, my self confidence, my attitude towards men, everything. So when I had enough of family, I packed up and left.

We are still in contact. Just spoke to him two days ago as a matter of fact. We have mended old wounds, and are rather close I would think. We still have our differences, but nothing will ever break us apart completely except for the big D.  But now the roles have changed. No, I do not have an addiction. Well, maybe chocolate. What I mean is that I am now down here in Alabama, with no family, except my husband’s side. I love them all, but there is nothing like your own. I miss my family dearly. However, I do not miss them enough toquotes-about-family-in-hd-wallpapers-family-quotes-admissionpk- leave Alabama. No, I will stay right here. But the circle of friends that I have are awesome! I have made myself a family through non-family. We are closer than most of my real family. Like I said, family is not always family.

I love the South. There is nothing that would or could pull me from here. For a long time I was a transient of sorts. I could not sit still. Just could not find my place in this big ol world. But now, I have, and I am in love with my life. I am in love with a great husband, wonderful children, and five awesome grandsons, and one precious granddaughter. All of which, are not my blood, but my husband’s children. I could never birth my own. I love  them like they were my own, and I believe they love me! Holidays are the biggest ordeal with us. So, why would I leave? It is ok to get homesick once in a while, but that’s it. After a point, reality has to set in, and get back to our lives, whatever that may be. Speaking of which, I have to get up and go cook dinner. We cook every night in the south. Whether big or small, dinner is always on the table by sundown. And ya have to have a Desert! It’s a Southern thing I think.

So, in the meantime, think on the important people in your lives. Tell them often how important they are to you. Blood or not, family is family. It is rare that we find others we can rely on in these days and times. Someone to listen, without judgement, and be there to pick us up, without question. Make sure your “Family” knows just how much they mean to you. Do not let too much time slip away, or it may end up being to late. Until next time, fill your glass, be blessed, stay Southern!

Lipton-KCups-TeaMoments

Posted in About Me, Blog, Religion

I can’t sit still!

600x450

Hey! How’s it going? Me? It’s been a great day! A longer week. Come on in, let me get you a glass of Tea. So, at my Church, I am a doorkeeper, a Deaconess, a videographer, I sing in the Choir, once a month we drive the Church van, and it all fell on the same week, this week. I am exhausted! That is not to mention the other million things I have going on in my life! Today was our Community Day on the Grass at my Church, Now Faith Church International, located in Pleasant Grove Alabama. We had an awesome time!

At the picnic today we had the music blasting, dancing on the lawn, children laughing and playing in the moonwalk, a Sno Cone machine, food smelling good. The grill was going with hot dogs and hamburgers for everyone in the Community at no charge. The elders were in the shade under the tree, eating bee bops. Takes me back to my childhood. What is a bee bop? It is a frozen kool aid in a small Styrofoam cup. We freeze them then, once frozen, you eat them on a hot day under a shade tree. Oh! but you have to pull the frozen delish out of the cup, n turn it upside down! They are so sweet and delicious. A southern favorite on a hot summer day! It is well-known among the neighborhood “candy lady”.

acfc517d441e9fa6398ae62477f7af34       09293bb3826f097aa05e8c76b6e51436

Oh yea, we dance, to gospel music. Some Christians know how to have fun and be saved. I also love to sing. Our Choir is amazing. Believe it or not, we started out fourteen years ago with three members in the Choir. Now we call it “Now Faith Mass” choir, because we have almost 25 people singing with us. I am not the best singer, but our Minister of Praise, he
can teach a duck to sing hunny!dc1c66dcd1d29747019fce4101d6ae81
So, I am also a doorkeeper. Yep, when anyone walks through that door, you will see my face to greet you with a great big “Hey, how you?” and a hug. I love people, so I asked specifically to be on the door. I want everyone to feel welcome when they come. I mean, who wants to see a sour puss when they visit a new church? Not me! I wouldn’t be back. I hate to see ugly faces. When I say ugly I mean frowns and complaining. Turn that frown upside down. Tomorrow I have to also ride with hubby, to pick up members on the Church van. It’s our week to drive. I will be so glad when this week is over! I can finally get some rest, maybe.

Oh, wait, I have to visit my cousin in the hospital, she had a stroke. I have to finish the videos I recorded of the Revival for the Church tape ministry, grocery shopping, laundry, type the minutes from our Motorcycle Ministry monthly meeting. Jeesh, I may get some rest next month. Yea, the end of May sounds good. But then again, that is Memorial weekend. As you can see, like I have mentioned before, in previous posts, I have a lot on my plate, as we say in the south. I can never sit still. I would probably be bored if I sat too long anyways.

I am not sure when I will get some good, all night rest. Am I the only one who moves like this? Do you have a tendency to always be moving? Comment below, let me know your thoughts on the subject. I will pause for now. But please stay tuned to see where this busy Southern life takes me! Come along for the ride, and keep your glass full. Until the next time we chat, stay blessed, stay southern!

post2

Microwave generation

Hey ya’ll! Come on in! What has been up with you since the last time we spoke? Me? I just been thinking about my childhood. Do you remember when we were young, everyone was in Church on Sunday morning, Wednesday Bible study, Friday youth group. We did not have a chance to get into any trouble. My Mother kept me busy with homework, and Church. Especially in the South! In the South it’s like a golden rule that Sundays you have your butt in Church, and we have fried chicken for dinner after.  Society was laid back, in slow motion back then. It was cool to get our first paper route at the age of ten, or lay in the grass in a field, and look at the clouds, naming shapes out of them.

LETS-GO-TO-CHURCH

Today, however, we are a diverse generation of chaos and instant pleasure. Our youth are lost. Mainly because the parents raising them are children themselves, however, the grandparents are not assisting either. Back in the day, it took a whole neighborhood to raise our youth. If I got a spanking, yes with a belt, at someone else home, I got another when I got home, for embarrassing my parents! I mean, I have had plenty of spankings, and I am still alive and well. I knew better than to cut up on my parents. I would rather be teased by my peers than to face my mother. By no means, do I agree with Child abuse. Let’s just be clear. But I do feel a small tap on the bottom every now and again just to remind them who the parent is, never hurt anyone.

These parents today do not want anyone spanking their children. Most of our youth of today  have never had a spanking. Ever. That, in my opinion, is the issue. There is no kind of consequence, no discipline. We just let our children do what they want as little ones. They sit around when “Grown folks are talking” as my mother used to say. We allow any kind of music and language in their presence. Then when they grow up, with an attitude, we want to get angry at them. Not good at all.

discpline children

Now there are still old school parents around, who do teach their off spring the importance of responsibility, respect, and life in general. They believe in spankings, punishment, and the responsibility for our actions. Their children flourish with education, and prosperity. I applaud you. There is nothing in the world like watching your teen walk across that stage on Graduation day!

Most everyone has a microwave in their kitchen. You know, you throw your food in and in five minutes or less, we have a dinner that normally takes thirty minutes or an hour on the stove. That is our generation of today. A microwave generation. Has been for a while. We want it, and we want it now. And we will do whatever it takes to get it.

discipline-yourself-quotes-success-quotes

Our youth today have no respect, no desire for an actual job, or respect of life. We don’t know the meaning of earning anything, hard work. There are those parents, mostly younger, who allow their children to, one, raise themselves, or two, watch their parents lead a bad example, then to only to follow in their footsteps. It’s almost a generational curse.

It saddens me to see our youth plunging downhill. I have stopped watching the news all together. Every time I turn it on, nothing but violence and crime. Our prisons flourish with young men under that age of 25. Most of the crime is on our Senior citizens. Picking on those who can not even fight back. Shame on you! Let’s get ourselves together people. If we do not wake up, and get our youth back, we are going to see our government raising them from afar. There are many ways to discipline. It does not have to be spankings if  you disagree with hitting. We do need to start when they are young. We do need to do something to get our youth back to a generation of respect and prosperity.

What are your thoughts on our youth? Do you believe in discipline? I would love to hear the thoughts of how and when to discipline. In the meantime, my glass is empty again. I need Tea. Until we meet again, be blessed, stay Southern.

_77708765_maristpoll

Discipline by Maxwell Maltz March 14, 2013 at http://www.verybestquotes.com/self-discipline-quotes-the-ability-to-discipline-yourself/
Letz go to church at http://quotesgram.com/funny-church-lady-quotes/#f6yPgP8v4X
Poll by BBC 21 September 2014  “Understanding black America and the spanking debate” at http://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-29261462

 

Copyright © 2016 SnoSouthernLife.com

Posted in About Me, Blog, Family

Do you date or hook up?

Hello my Southern friends! It is good to see you again. I’m just pouring this tea, getting ready to sit up under the stars with hubby on the porch.  After 14 years, my husband still dates me. Whether we get dressed up and go out to dinner and a movie, or a walk after midnight in the park, or for a ride down a country road on the motorcycle, I love our alone time. We are still best friends after all this time!

223 This is my favorite picture of us taken in 2007. We still have the same bike, the same color. I look at other couples in our life, other women friends of mine, and it amazes me how people don’t spend time together anymore like in the old days. I see the women constantly out with the girls, or the guys out with the guys, but never together. Hubby and I went to a gathering about three weeks ago, and a guy friend hugged me, and asks “where is hubby? I know he isn’t far, your always together!”.

Today’s generation of dating, and marriage is so different from when my parents were young. Of course we can expect change and growth in society, but what happened to dating? What happened to a man picking you up for a date? or opening a door for a lady? I appreciate my Mother-in-law so much. She passed away in 2007, rest her soul. The man she raised that is my husband today, was taught the manners of old school. He opens doors, he is trust worthy, a man  of his word, and is well-respected by everyone who meets him. Now I am not bragging on him, but in a sense I am. Our marriage is one of the same characters. We have communication, trust, integrity, and God. But most of all, we LIKE each other. We are best friends.

I remember my ex-husband, when we met, I knew him two weeks, ran off and married him. I know, I know. What was I thinking? I wasn’t, that was the problem. By my twenties, I had become a hard-headed naive girl who believed everything a man told me. I found out the hard way that I should have dated him first, got to know what I was getting into. (That is another blog, maybe tomorrow). If I had taken my time, I would have saved a whole lot of heart ache and bruises.

051a2e4dad0d5b557851c61dcd6e2be8bd0286-wm

However, the choices I made then, are why I am the person I have become today. I am stronger, wiser, and more reserved on my choices. I take time to analyze, and pray for guidance. I do not regret one minute, even the bad stuff. It has taught me a lot about myself, and who I really am. I truly am just now enjoying my life now, more than my younger years. I was always told my twenties would be the best time of my life. I feel like my forties have been the best. And the older I get, the happier I seem to be. All with thanks to God and my husband of course!

My husband is a humble and patient man. Completely different from my ex. That man dated me six months before we finally committed to each other significantly. He actually always told others he was gonna find me  a good man. We were just friends, who fell in love. He took the time to show me what kind of man he truly is. He made it so I could not help but to trust him with my heart. He made it easy to fall in love, and boy did I fall hard!

Quote-63

My point of all this? Take your time ladies. Slow down and make him date you. If a man truly is interested, he truly wants to get to know you for more than your outer appearance, for more than 1 date, he will be patient. He won’t mind waiting on the goodies, and take appetizer’s until you become everything to each other. And if it does not work, then that is not God’s chosen for you.

I could go on and on. Once I start talking there really is no end. I just want my girlfriends to have what I have. I wish I could sell the honest pure love that our marriage has, in a cup. I’d be rich! But right now my cup is empty, so I need to refill, on sweet tea that is. So until the next time, keep calm,move slow. Respect yourself enough to date, and not “Hook-up”. Until the next glass of Tea, stay blessed, stay southern!

id-like-a-sweet-iced-tea-please-is-unsweet-with-sugar-packets-ok-is-monopoly-money-ok-fac43

One Hope Picture BY · AUGUST 11, 2015 at http://onehope.com/slow-down/